Mark Allen, Interested Person

Sunday, 2/28/2010
It’s hardly news that this platinum product is utter dogshit even by heavy metal standards; under direct orders from editors who don’t know Iron Maiden from Wynton Marsalis, my beleaguered colleagues on the dailies have been saying so all year, and every insult goes into the press kit. Still, I must mention Mick Mars’s dork-fingered guitar before getting to the one truly remarkable thing about this record: a track called “Ten Seconds To Love” in which Vince Neil actually seems to boast about how fast he can ejaculate (or as the lyric sheet puts it, “cum”). And therein, I believe, lies the secret of their commercial appeal—if you don’t got it, flaunt it. Follow-up: “Pinkie Prick.” D

Robert Christgau reviews Mötley Crüe’s Shout at the Devil

It’s kind of amazing how fast they can analyze data like this. (via Burrito Justice)

It’s kind of amazing how fast they can analyze data like this. (via Burrito Justice)

Saturday, 2/27/2010

[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]

Phosphorescent — It’s Hard To Be Humble (When You’re From Alabama)

I loved Phosphorescent’s haunting sound up through Pride. I loved the faithful Willie Nelson cover album To Willie. And based on this teaser song, I feel pretty confident that I’ll love their new album Here’s To Taking It Easy. Matthew Houck can seemingly do no wrong by me.

Jesse Schell on the future of games

This talk at the DICE 2010 video game conference is jam packed with completely mindset-altering ideas about how things like Webkinz and Farmville are going to change our society and our selves. Watch it.

Friday, 2/26/2010

Poison - Talk Dirty To Me

Remove about 10 cans of hairspray, the dance moves and the fog machine, and this could be a Replacements song.

Edit: Oh, of course the marketing wizards at Capitol would prohibit embedding. Just click through to watch it on YouTube.

Thursday, 2/25/2010

[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]

Mötley Crüe — Shout At The Devil

Admit it, this song is pretty badass.

Funniest Facebook ad I’ve seen in a while (In case you don’t recognize Epic Beard Man, here’s some background). I can only assume the “reason” alluded to in the ad is some combination of mental illness and racism.

Funniest Facebook ad I’ve seen in a while (In case you don’t recognize Epic Beard Man, here’s some background). I can only assume the “reason” alluded to in the ad is some combination of mental illness and racism.

Tuesday, 2/23/2010
Monday, 2/22/2010

[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]

Epic Soundtracks — Meet Me On The Beach

If, hypothetically, you find yourself in the midst of a hair metal kick and you start worrying that it’s going to become permanent, you’d find that Epic Soundtracks makes for a good antidote. Hypothetically.

Sunday, 2/21/2010
This video I downloaded off bittorrent has tracking issues. Kind of mind blowing.

This video I downloaded off bittorrent has tracking issues. Kind of mind blowing.

Saturday, 2/20/2010
Totally my type. (Diane, not Woody. Well, it’s probably Diane as written by Woody. But still.)

Totally my type. (Diane, not Woody. Well, it’s probably Diane as written by Woody. But still.)

Tuesday, 2/16/2010
Someone overnight me some Belle & Sebastian records STAT, because it looks like I’m turning into a completely unironic late-80s metalhead. I have two theories as to why this is happening: Either it’s a desperate cry for help that I need to find a woman who will not let me indulge in my every whim, or it’s a sign that I have already crossed the point of no return and all that’s left is for me to move back into my parents’ basement and start huffing gas.

Someone overnight me some Belle & Sebastian records STAT, because it looks like I’m turning into a completely unironic late-80s metalhead. I have two theories as to why this is happening: Either it’s a desperate cry for help that I need to find a woman who will not let me indulge in my every whim, or it’s a sign that I have already crossed the point of no return and all that’s left is for me to move back into my parents’ basement and start huffing gas.